St Patricks Day Jokes That’ll Shamrock Your Socks Off

Table of Content

I. Introduction

II. 100 St. Patrick's Day jokes

Introduction

Whether or not you have Irish roots, just about everyone loves getting into the spirit of St. Patrick’s Day on March 17. That’s why this year, it’s time to let your inner leprechaun shine and embrace the silliness of the season. How can you do that? By sharing some hilarious St. Patrick’s Day jokes that’ll have your friends and family Dublin over with laughter all day long.

See more: 135 Irish New Year's Blessing Ideas to Start Your Year with Joy

No need to rack your brain coming up with jokes yourself—we’ve gathered 100 of the best St. Paddy’s Day jokes out there. From playful puns about rainbows and Ireland to clever one-liners about four-leaf clovers and Guinness, this list has it all. Some of them are gloriously cheesy, but that just adds to the festive fun!

St. Patrick’s Day on March 17

So, get ready to laugh—here are 100 funny St. Patrick’s Day jokes guaranteed to bring a smile to your face.

100 St. Patrick's Day jokes

Why did the leprechaun head outdoors?
He wanted to chill on his patio.
What kind of bow isn’t made from ribbon?
A rainbow.
What music do leprechauns jam to?
Shamrock and roll!
What’s a ghost’s favorite St. Paddy’s drink?
BOOze.
What’s an Irish spider called?
Paddy with long legs.
When does a leprechaun cross the street?
Only when the light turns green.
What do you get mixing Christmas with March 17?
Saint O’Claus.
What did the leprechaun say at the end of his game?
That’s game clover!
What’s the go-to cereal in leprechaun land?
Lucky Charms.
Why did St. Patrick kick out all the snakes?
Because he didn’t want to walk around them!
What’s a leprechaun’s ideal baseball position?
Shortstop, of course.
What do you call a sick leprechaun?
A streprechaun.
What’s an Irish ghost’s favorite greeting?
Top o’ the moaning to ya!
What do you call a fake shamrock gem?
A sham-fake.
What instrument does an egotistical Irishman play?
The bragpipes.
When is an Irish potato no longer Irish?
When it’s French fried.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Erin.
Erin who?
Erin after that leprechaun but he got away!
How do leprechauns stay fit?
By always pushing their luck.
What’s tall, green, and only appears once yearly?
The St. Patrick’s Day parade.
What does a leprechaun call someone in green?
A green giant.
Why do leprechauns love gold pots?
They enjoy golden luxury.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Clover.
Clover who?
Clover here so I can tell you something.
How do you know an Irishman’s having fun?
He’s laughing so hard he’s Dublin over.
Where do tiny green folk vacation?
In their lepre-condos.
How old are leprechauns really?
They remember when rainbows were black and white.
Why did the leprechaun climb the potato?
To avoid drowning in the stew.
What happens when two leprechauns talk?
It’s all small talk.
Why don’t leprechauns like leftovers?
They want fresh clovers!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Ireland.
Ireland who?
Ireland you money last week!
Why not wear real rocks on St. Patrick’s Day?
They’re too heavy—shamrocks are better.
What does Ireland have more of than anywhere else?
Irish people.
What’s The Rock’s name in Ireland?
The Sham-Rock.
What do musicians play to impress on March 17?
Their bragpipes.
Why can’t you get a loan from a leprechaun?
They’re always a little short.
When is Valentine’s Day after St. Patrick’s Day?
Only in a dictionary.
What does a leprechaun put into vending machines?
Lepre-coins.
What do eco-friendly leprechauns call themselves?
Wee-cyclers.
What’s green and left in the backyard?
Paddy O’Furniture.
What do you get mixing a pillow and a rock?
A sham-rock.
How does a leprechaun go to space?
In a sham-rocket.
Why are leprechauns eco-warriors?
Because they love all things green.
How’d the leprechaun win the race?
He took a magical shortcut.
What’s a leprechaun’s job at a diner?
The short-order chef.
How did Irish dancing start?
Too much Guinness, not enough bathrooms.
What’s it mean if you find a horseshoe?
Some poor horse is barefoot.
How do you recognize a jealous shamrock?
It’s super green with envy.
Why can’t Irish golfers leave the course?
They’re stuck on the green.
What’s a mischievous leprechaun get for Christmas?
A pot full of coal.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Pat.
Pat who?
Pat your jacket—we’re heading to the parade!
What do you call a dance gone wrong?
A jig-saster.
Knock, knock. Who’s there?
Irish.
Irish who?
Irish you a joyful St. Patrick’s Day!
Why don’t people iron four-leaf clovers?
Because pressing your luck is risky business.
What should you shout at a St. Patrick’s Day runner?
Irish you all the best!
Why don’t leprechauns go for a jog?
They’d rather dance a jig than break a sweat.
Who’s St. Patrick’s top superhero?
Definitely the Green Lantern.
Why do leprechauns thrive in gardening?
They’ve got green thumbs.
What’s St. Patrick’s go-to drink at a Chinese restaurant?
A hot cup of green tea.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Irish.
Irish who?
Irish stew if you don’t let me in!
Why are leprechauns tricky to hang out with?
They’ve got short fuses.
What’s a witch’s go-to spell on March 17?
A charm of luck!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Saint.
Saint who?
Saint got time to waste—open the door!
What did the baby leprechaun find at the end of the rainbow?
A potty full of gold.
What do leprechauns grill on St. Patrick’s Day?
Tiny short ribs.
What’s a favorite Irish dance move at fast food joints?
The Shamrock Shake.
What did the leprechaun tell his neighbor on St. Paddy’s Day?
Irish you lots of green cheer!
Why do leprechauns prefer bills to coins?
Because cash is green like them.
How is a best friend like a four-leaf clover?
Both are rare and bring luck.
What does an Irish potato say to its date?
I’ve only got eyes for you!
Why are frogs into St. Patrick’s Day?
They’re always dressed in green!
What do Irish folks say when you mention Bono?
You too?
Why is the River Shannon rich?
It’s got two banks!
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Boy.
Boy who?
Boy, do I love this holiday!
How do leprechauns throw concerts?
They host a lepre-concert!
Why did the leprechaun cross the rainbow?
To get to the lucky side.
What did the Irish soccer referee say at the final whistle?
That’s game clover!
Why are leprechauns great at office jobs?
They’re excellent at shorthand.
What do you call an Irishman bouncing off walls?
Rick O’Shay.
What is a “nuahcerpel”?
Just “leprechaun” backward!
What breed of dog should you bring to the St. Patrick’s party?
An Irish Setter.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Irish.
Irish who?
Irish I had better luck finding clovers.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Warren.
Warren who?
Warren anything green for today?
What’s the ultimate Irish breakfast?
Green eggs and ham.
Where do leprechauns play baseball?
In a teeny-tiny league.
How do you pay for soda on St. Paddy’s?
With a slice of soda bread.
What’s an Irish baby’s favorite song?
“Patty Cake!”
What happens if a leprechaun falls in the sea?
He gets sham-soaked.
What’s big, purple, and near Ireland?
Grape Britain.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Leper.
Leper who?
Leprechaun, and I’m here to pinch anyone not wearing green!
What do you get when a frog meets a leprechaun?
A hopping good time in a tiny body.
What sings in the garden and wears green?
Elvis Parsley.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Pat.
Pat who?
Pat on your hat—we’re going to the party!
Why did the leprechaun skip the soup?
He already had a full pot of gold!
What do you get when you mix poison ivy with a lucky clover?
An itch of good fortune.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Potto.
Potto who?
Potto gold—at the end of the rainbow!
Why don’t women want to get engaged on March 17?
They’re afraid of getting a sham rock.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cora.
Cora who?
Coran beef and cabbage is ready!
What do you get doing the Irish jig at McDonald’s?
A Shamrock Shake.
Hiss off!
What do you call a jailed leprechaun?
A lepre-con.
What does it mean if you spot a four-leaf clover?
You probably have too much free time!